I seem to tell everyone I lost 100 pounds. Of course I tell friends and family who have been with me on this journey. But I also work it into conversations with store clerks, repairmen, new acquaintances, complete strangers – I can’t seem to stop myself.
Many gasp with disbelief – ‘You? You lost 100 pounds?’ (Thanks!) Most ask, “how did you do it?” But almost universally, they celebrate with me. ‘Good for you!’ ‘ You look great!’ Sometimes they clap.
When I think about it, I think I should be quiet about it. Why aren’t I ashamed that I needed to lose 100 pounds? That I let my body fall into such a sorry state of disrepair? Secretly, buried deep inside my sub-conscious, for 20 years I was ashamed. I denied how I felt about it. I even denied how I looked.
But it wasn’t a secret to anyone that I was overweight, I couldn’t hide it, it was visible for all to see. So having exposed my secret every day for 20 years, I want everyone to know what they can’t see. That I won a battle they didn’t know I fought, that I am a new person, someone who is visible. Whether it’s because I have freed my personality from trying to take up less space or whether I am now visible to people who used to make me feel invisible. I want to be seen. I have moved back into my body. I’m home and I’m happy.
27 Days and Counting
AWESOME!!
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